I’m often asked, Levi, you know, being the Universe and all, “What’s
the purpose of life?” But truthfully, no matter who or what you are that’s
a pretty daunting question. So daunting, I’m invariably compelled to reply
with a few questions of my own:
“Do you mean besides having fun? Besides learning that the world has
always spun in the palm of your hand? Besides bicycles, long walks, and
hot chocolate? Besides holding hands, giving hugs, and drying tears?
Besides having a dream and making it come true? Besides February, Fridays,
and Polar Bears? Besides witnessing miracles that only you are privy to?
Besides sunrises, sunsets, and every rare and fleeting moment in between?”
Daunting is an understatement.
I feel like writing. Actually, I have many other things that I can be doing right now to better use my time, i.e. I can be filing or practicing, or studying, but, as it seems, I have too many thoughts to continue in such a manner that I would be holding them in to think about. I really don’t know how to begin cataloging my thoughts on this. Ordinarily, I would write on paper what is on my mind, but it seems much harder knowing that people can potentially read this. Although I know that is most unlikely, it still lingers on my mind. So, I think I’m going to write this like a professional essay:
It’s a bit of a wild whim to say that the expression on someone’s face is always truthful. Really, they can be hiding essentially anything that they don’t want to be publicly displayed. Hiding behind the facade of something that is seemingly happier than they truly are can possibly be one of the easiest things to do. A smile, when none other, can be the foremost strongest expression to hide the entity of the individual’s mind. Thus, creating the mask of deceit. This is not however, the only means of our undoing, when in fact our actions can stretch much farther into our minds and into our psyche than we even care to realize. Truthfully, when we look at someone—primarily someone we have a strong attraction to—it is far easier to remember all the bad parts of that person—if there are any, which, in most cases the cache is ample. And it is because of this anterior demonstration of strong dislike and discomfort that we immediately rush upon this change in expression to mask the discomfort. Yes, we may show it but that does not mean that we ultimately want to show it, when truly, in response to this it is our first instinct to put a menacing smile on our hate-founded faces and never really allow identification into the offender’s mind.
[Oh, by the way, I’m Floresville’s male student of the month for January]
is so boring. I have a lot to complain when it comes to this course, and, the hilarious part of all this is that I type as she talks. Since 6:30 I have been in this room and I can concur with any other student sitting in this room when I say that this is the most inefficient teacher that I have ever sat in front of. (Or, well on screen.)
To whom this touches the most,
Look at the stars, look how they shine for you and everything you do. And they were all yellow. I came along, I wrote a song for you and all the things you do.
This is for you.
Storms roll in constantly, but none like this. Ever. Perhaps it’s the absence of someone. No one in general, just someone–company; or perhaps it’s the absence of the two people I’ve seen almost every day of my thriving seventeen year old life.
Something in the dull afternoon light exemplifies both absences. Personally, I think it’s the raindrops. They purposely bend the light of the obvious–where is everyone?
its been over a week since i last posted something on here! Where has all the time gone!!!??? It feels like just yesterday I was telling you about a party. (:
I don’t know, things have been pretty hectic. I re-joined the Leo’s Club in town and wow, I’m already working with people and setting up events, and even an officer! On my first night back I was made reporter! wow. haha
As we near graduation I start to feel a bit more empty every day. My friends are leaving to different schools, who knows when I will see them again, and frankly, I don’t want friends to leave me. Who does? But more deeply, I will never want to loose a friend over a pathetic distance problem. And why then, do we assume that friends will leave us when there is a distance greater than fifty miles between us? Are we as people so quick to forget the relationships we have? The bonds that were built and the connections that were strengthened? It helps that I’m going to the same university as some of them, but not all of them. Then finally, after they graduate what am I? A senior. It’s my turn to leave my friends. It’s one big, happy vicious cycle.
When I blog I always have a soundtrack
“Sammeh’s Songs 4 U! [=” It’s gone right now and I’m easily loosing my train of thought…
[I don’t know what this picture should be saying… I don’t even know why I chose it. Analyze my feelings with it.]
Posted in 1
Tagged blogging, bonds, college, connections, empty, friends, graduation, loss, love, party, seniors
ok so i get into these totally random waves of using my computer. Usually it starts when school really starts to pick up and I get a lot of work. Soooo, my blogging might be slowing down for that reason /: Sometimes I even forget that I have the internet, or a computer for that matter! haha
wellll tonight, me and my bestie Samantha are going to the movies and to go eat, like every weekend!
sooo tonight is the firebowl cafe and then Knowing! I hope its good!
[this is sam]
[i love her.]